Finally I got to see the movie 2012. I couldn’t get a balcony ticket so had to settle for the cattle class. Yes, you guessed it right I do follow Tharoor. Cramped seating, bad odour and not to mention the pathetic viewing angle. Everything about the theatre experience was perfect for a disaster movie! I wouldn’t have bothered had it not been the article I read from OPEN. I don’t want to review the movie here because I know there are many out there who are better than I am and earn a living for it (faltu mein unke pett par lath kyun maru!). And moreover judging a movie based on a review is one of the most stupidest thing you can ever do. I always do that.

2012 is a must see. Suppose the world does come to an end on 12.21.12 (American date system. It looks good, eh? Americans can make the silliest of date look cool.); the movie is your only help to survive the catastrophe. The movie through its 2 hour “fun-filled” commotion and “high voltage” melodrama gives us a list of Dos and Don’ts before the world settles down in peace.

Dos

  1. You need a limo. Don’t have money for it? Steal it then.
  2. Bentley. Don’t have it. I hope you know what to do now.
  3. A big fat Russian airplane.
  4. Of course you’ll then need a pilot if you don’t know how to fly it.
  5. Your wife. You can’t steal one so just get hitched. If you are smart, marry someone who can afford all the things mentioned above.
  6. Two kids. Hmmm, it’s not possible, practically; still you can give a shot! You never know.
  7. Wife’s boyfriend, who’ll give his life for your wife. To be precise, you’ll need a bakra. Easy to find.
  8. monk. Not Old Monk. Just the good old monk.
  9. geologist. He’s the geek and the person who knows it all.
  10. American President’s daughter. She’ll keep your geek in check.

Don’ts
First do the Dos then we shall talk about the Don’ts.

Yes the list is now complete. But of course in between the chaos you need to run a lot. Stamina is the key. So start exercising. Start dieting too, there could be a serious shortage of food too. If you’re a vegetarian, you are in big trouble. And if you’re a non-vegetarian, you’re dead.

Yeah so what happens if the world really comes to an end? Seriously, do give a thought. As for me I would rather die in pieces in my home than run around the world only to rest in peace.

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