Category: Advertising


Today I came across an article on how some brands are associating itself with 26/11 anniversary and why some are shying away from it. No you are wrong. This isn’t just another write-up criticising the Idea ad for being insensitive to the whole issue. So let’s just continue.

The article mentions about a 26/11 website hosted by MSN India. So naturally I wanted to see the website.  I typed 26/11 on my Google bar. And in 0.19 seconds, the search engine splashed 15,500,000 web entries. But on top of the search results was the mathematical result, 26/11 = 2.36363636. Google calculator was spot on. I scrolled down and saw the Wikipedia entries on November 26, followed by September 11 attacks. I wondered why not search 9/11.

I googled 9/11. 22,700,000 entries filled up my screen. And it took 0.03 seconds less. Wow! The search results contained all the usual suspects. Mostly wikis – Wikipedia and WikiLeaks. But there was no sign of the mathematical result. What the heck is this? Why 9/11 has been singled out? (Check it out and please do tell me if there are other exceptions, I hope not).  If these results are based on some “complex algorithms” as Google had stated in its apology to Michelle Obama, why is that the mathematical result not shown?

So what was I searching for… oh yeah the MSN 26/11 website. Maybe Bing can give me some answers. Kyon nahin dono (Bing and MSN) ek hi baap ke toh bete hain. I searched 26/11 on Bing and surprise surprise it too had a calculator and the answer it showed was correct but unlike Google’s answer, this result was restricted to just 6 decimal places.  So like any curious guy who has nothing to do but keep searching, I binged 9/11. It left me disappointed. Yes, again there was no sign of the mathematical result. So it just wasn’t the Google but even Bing too had some problem in giving out the mathematical result.

So what’s next I said to myself. Simple, let’s Yahoo! Et tu Yahoo! Like Google and Bing, Yahoo! too didn’t have any mathematical result for 9/11 but it correctly gave the answer to 26/11 and that too to 10 decimal places.

So what inference can I draw from all these? I thought for a while. Here it is: Sab search engine ka baap alag hain par maa toh ek hi hain – America.

South Indian film actors are an obsessive lot. For them and their fans, a title is the mark of an actor’s success. If they are to be believed, any actor without a title hasn’t been up there yet. It has become an absolute necessity to possess one. Therefore we have many superstars, megastars, universal stars, a thalaivar, a thalapathy, an illai thalapathy and what not. Even the most “intellectual” actors don’t mind keeping one. Kamal Hassan is Dr. Kamal Hassan. Mammootty is Padma Shri Bharath Mammootty and Mohanlal is Bharath Mohanlal.

Little do Mammootty and Mohanlal know that the title “Bharath” was removed long ago before either of them had won the National Award for Best Actor. In fact the last person to receive the title “Bharath” was Gopi. And ever since he has been known as Bharath Gopi. Imagine Tom Hanks being called Oscar Hanks, Russell Crowe – Oscar Crowe and Sean Penn – Oscar Penn. But then there are exceptions even in the West too, albeit a bit dignified, Sean Connery is Sir Sean Connery!

What about the South Indian actresses? With the exception of Silk Smitha, Shakeela and Co., I have never seen any title for mainstream actress until today. It was a poster of the movie Drona (not the AB-Chops one). The poster shouted “High voltage action” (burp). And then there was this extremely thoughtful line (kudos to the producer and the marketing guys) “The hot buxom beauty Priyamani in Drona”. So what if Priyamani had won the National Award for Best Actress in 2007, Tamil Nadu State Award for the Best Actress the same year, and two Filmfare Awards; for some her awards still fall well short of her physical attributes.

Only FCPs invited.

National Geographic is sexist. Or what else do you make of this ad.

And strangely enough, National Geographic feels most women will be staying at home, 12 noon on Saturdays. What crap!

Outlook has been bombarding my mail box with a flurry of emails for the past few weeks –  enticing, persuading, and finally begging me to subscribe to their new “exclusive privilege offer”.

The offers are indeed attractive. The subscription for 5 years is Rs. 2699/- as against the newsstand price of Rs.6375/- plus 5 Benetton t-shirts. Wow! Then a footnote: The limited offer is only valid till Dec 15, 2009.

The deadline is over. Hey bhagwan ab kya hoga!

Then a mail appears on Dec 16th – the “limited” offer has been extended for another day, just for me! How considerate.

I fail to subscribe, once again. Haath aaya par mooh na laga!

And finally on Dec 22nd I receive another mail – the “limited exclusive offer” has been extended till Jan 15th because of “overwhelming” response. Hmmm how true. To make it realistic they add a footnote: Ignore the mail if you’ve already renewed it!

Considering the number of times they have send the emails and clogged my inbox, I do them a favour- an act of noble revenge. If you are interested in subscribing to Outlook, click here!

What’s wrong with this ad?

Times Now proclaims it’s racist. I don’t think so. Do you? Come on, don’t we all aspire for foreign goods. Who don’t want a PS3, iPod, Levis Strauss, Arrow, blah..blah. I would just say the ad is confusing. Nothing else.